This artistic life can be a crazy one (and not always crazy fun). Seems like a lot of the time all we can do is strap ourselves in for the ride. Luckily we have each other; And so I’m launching a new segment here at R2R… Forming a panel of awesome artists who are kind enough to answer a few financial questions, share their opinions, tips, and foibles.

Today we talk taxes with some lovely ladies and gentlemen from all over North America. We have JoJo, a stage manager from Toronto, Doug, a singer from the prairies, Jenna, a collaborative pianist and fellow arts blogger, Tammy, our token American and a kickin’ soprano, and Mikey, a composer based on the west coast.

I asked them a few questions about their taxes…

JoJo: I spend a lot of money on alcohol, and anything from Shoppers.

Doug: What surprises me every year when I do my taxes is the fact that I consistently make more money than I thought I had.  This has more to do with poor budgeting than anything else – it never feels like I made that much!

Jenna: HST! Shouldn’t surprise me, but as a self-employed lady, it does.

Tammy: I look at my “contract” income for the year and go, “Oooooo I made a lot this year.” Then after, housing, flights, manager commissions, foreign taxes, concert dresses, groceries, mortgage, water, electricity, internet, and all the other bills and I go, “oh no, I am actually poor.” The thing that surprises me the most is how inconsistent my expenses are.

Mikey: Every year, I’m surprised by the fact that I have to pay money at all when I still have a bazillion dollars in education tax credits banked 🙁

JoJo: Unlubricated condoms. Love working in theatre.

Doug: I had a few years where I was studying clown, improv, and writing through movement – I had these receipts from toy shops and dollar stores for inflatable balls, kids toys, art supplies.  It was some of the flakiest equipment I’ve ever worked with, and I could just picture the look on the auditor’s face as I had to explain – “Well, you see, I put the ball under this vulnerable nerve cluster under my back, and I lie on it for a couple of hours until it makes me scream and releases images that I then write down and make into performance art pieces.”  (The auditor is clearly thinking ‘this guy doesn’t need an agent, he needs a therapist!’)

Jenna: I’m not sure if he ended up doing it, but one singer told me he’d write off his horseback riding lessons for a show!

Tammy: Thinking of the conversation about lingerie with an auditor would be weird. Certain evening gowns need certain undergarments. That’s all there is to it.

Mikey: I can’t think of any ‘weird’ deductions off the top of my head, but that’s probably because I don’t think there are any weird deductions, just weird people. Any deduction can be creatively justified, otherwise you’d be an idiot to try! I remember someone once saying that they wrote off lotto tickets, at the time it struck me as odd, but people are a creative bunch.

JoJo: Denial is a powerful powerful tool!

Billions… here I come!!!!!

Doug: You would be astonished what I will do to avoid doing my taxes.  Cut the lawn, weed the garden, do all the laundry/dishes/vacuuming…  The first person who makes an app/computer game that has you conquer the world/run a farm/crush candies based on how often you enter your tax receipts will be a multi-billionaire.

Jenna: Learn all of Don Giovanni. Oops.

Tammy: I am the best at procrastinating. I could teach a class. I will do anything and everything to procrastinate doing my taxes. I’ll redo flower beds, paint, household repairs, sewing, ironing, reorganizing sheet music, rearranging all of the furniture in my house to make it feng shui. Only after all of that will I sit down and do my taxes.

Mikey: Each year, I pat myself on the back for ‘doing’ my taxes. As in, there’s a manilla envelope on my desk right now that has receipts, T4s, T2202s, etc, but shh!! it’s not really done!
Just like every other year, I’m convinced that there’s a deduction I’m forgetting about, so the envelope will sit there until the last minute when I eventually give up and file them anyway. It’s convenient that way. I get to believe that the government is screwing me outta money because I didn’t have enough time to account for all my expenses. 😉

Remember… procrastination doesn’t have to always be Netflix… sometimes it can be pretty!!!

What about you guys? What surprises do you find when you sort through your yearly expenses? Weirdest deductions? Procrastination techniques?