In the early days my tomato grew up. This is the way things should be. I was pleased.
But after returning from some time away I found it had made a choice to grow sideways. Straight sideways. Right into the middle of a bush.
I was less pleased. But I also have never felt closer to the decision making process of a plant.
From a bird’s eye (read: person’s eye) view, it’s often clear what good decision making is. Up is good. Up is structurally sound. Up is where the sun is.
But when we’re the one making the decision it’s never that clear. There is always uncertainty. I don’t know what that tomato was thinking, but I’m sure it made sense at the time.
These days, decision are hard. It’s impossible to know what’s coming and what the “right choice” is. I’m sure I’m making lots of sideways decisions.
I take comfort (sometimes) in reminding myself that all I can do is make the best choice I can with the information and emotional resources I currently have. It might mean having to fix things later. It might mean a real set back in metaphorical fruit production.
But it’s all that can be done.